september 2020

 

                              (i)

...there are the outer fires and the inner fires

moments of clairvoyant rage

in which the gods of nothingness

feed their endless hunger through my soul

their thirst down into my endless bones

and this ash that rises

these words that blister the skin

they are, I suppose, a sort of emancipation

an emptiness, an omertà

that nails tongues to the ground

to this endless, infernal hunger

which has tried and tried

to eat its way through to the truth

to that clairvoyant mask

lurking in the earth’s greasy shadow

its flames merging

its ash spinning

simply because I am endless

because I am someone

who has already been burning

for millions of  years...

 

                      (ii)

...what is this exotic mastery

which always seems to need its x’s and its y’s

its unconscionable light-years

its spirals branded onto our cheeks

is it simply a mystic migraine

bending space

filling every corner of every breathable world

with outright dominance

or is it something else

an inaccessible mastery

a rogue universe perhaps

its x’s eating all sentient life

its y’s tracing out these spirals

these exotic vows 

that promise when a stream of light

is again made solid

and the breathless, insane immensity of all things

transmutes back

into a gleam of fire

back into this cosmic migraine

then will our pain finally master the truth...

 

 

 

 

                             (iii)

...every day I hang off the face of a mountain

waiting for wings

waiting for my bones to grow hollow

it is these winds, these howling noises

they carry a dangerous meaning

they sob and greet directly into my blood

this strange, ominous love

whispering ‘you have merely trespassed

your way all through life

flight is now the only freedom you have left’

far below I see the rivers glisten

like ribbons of unearthly silver

the frayed ends of fate

and in the blinding distance the oceans

strewn with discarded souls and gods

 eating the air

suddenly the mountains stand

and lift my wings

the helpless moment has come

my raven claws release their grip

and I rise and rise

an unwanted trespasser no more...